Your child’s connection to you is what helps them feel safe and secure in the world, both physically and emotionally. To connect means to make our relationship secure. When we are responsive to our child’s physical and emotional needs consistently, the more secure attachment we tend to form with them. The daily grind of busy schedules and being pulled in multiple directions may leave you questioning your abilities but with some time and effort, you can work on building your connection. While we typically discuss the concept of attachment in the newborn and infant phase, attachment is important throughout childhood. Even our older children need to feel they can rely on us for physical and emotional support. Connecting with your child is of paramount importance for their overall development, well-being, and the strength of your parent-child relationship. 

Importance of building a strong connection with your child:

• Emotional bond: Building a strong emotional bond with your child helps them feel secure, loved, and valued. This bond forms the foundation for their future relationships and emotional well-being.
• Trust and communication: Connecting with your child fosters trust and open communication. When your child feels comfortable talking to you, they are more likely to share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns. This paves the way for healthy problem-solving and conflict resolution.
• Understanding and support: Strong connections enable you to understand your child better, including their unique strengths, interests, and challenges. This understanding allows you to provide the necessary support and guidance tailored to their individual needs.
• Resilience and self-confidence: When children feel connected to their parents, they develop a sense of belonging and security. This contributes to their overall resilience and self-confidence, helping them navigate life’s challenges with greater ease and optimism.
• Lifelong relationship: Connecting with your child fosters a lifelong relationship built on trust, love, and mutual respect. By nurturing this bond from an early age, you create a solid foundation for a lasting relationship as they grow into adulthood.

Here are several strategies to help you connect with your child:

• Establish quality time: Spend quality time with your child, free from distractions. Engage in activities that interest them, such as playing games, going for walks, or simply having conversations. Actively listen to them and show genuine interest in what they have to say.
• Foster open and honest communication with your child: Create a safe and non-judgmental space for them to express their thoughts and feelings. Encourage them to share their experiences, ask questions, and actively listen to their perspectives.
• Establish rituals and routines: Develop special rituals and routines that you can share with your child. It can be something as simple as a bedtime routine, family meals, or weekend outings. Consistency in these rituals helps create a sense of stability and strengthens your bond.
• Show empathy and understanding: Put yourself in your child’s shoes and try to understand their point of view. Validate their emotions and experiences, even if you may not agree with them. Showing empathy and understanding helps your child feel heard and supported.
• Play and have fun together: Engage in playtime with your child. Play is a powerful medium for connection, bonding, and learning. Join them in their imaginative play, board games, or outdoor activities. Laughing and having fun together create joyful memories and strengthen your relationship. 
• Be emotionally available: Make yourself emotionally available to your child. Be attentive to their emotional needs and offer comfort and support when they are upset or facing challenges. Let them know that you are there for them and that they can rely on you.
• Respect their autonomy: Allow your child to have a sense of autonomy and make age-appropriate decisions. Respect their boundaries, opinions, and choices, even if they differ from yours. This fosters trust and strengthens their sense of self.
• Express love and affection: Show your child love and affection regularly. Hugs, kisses, and words of affirmation go a long way in making them feel valued and loved. Find ways to express your love and appreciation for them on a daily basis.

Remember, building a strong connection with your child is an ongoing process that requires consistency, patience, and adaptability. Every child is unique, so it’s important to tailor your strategies to their individual needs and personalities.